Messy Families encouraged to move from “frantic” to fruitful at Messy Family Project evenings in Mount Maunganui and Hamilton.

Families from across the diocese gathered in both Mount Maunganui and Hamilton recently for two evenings with founders of the Messy Family Project, Mike and Alicia Hernon, exploring what it means to build a strong Catholic family culture in the middle of modern life.

Rather than presenting an idealised image of family life, the couple spoke candidly about the realities many parents are navigating — busy schedules, digital overwhelm, social pressures, exhaustion, and the challenge of raising children intentionally in a rapidly changing culture.

One of the strongest themes throughout the evening was the impact of technology and social media on children and teenagers. Drawing on both research and their own experience as parents, the Hernons encouraged families to approach technology not with fear, but with clarity, boundaries, and intentional formation.

“There has never been a situation in human history where children have had access to an entirely unfiltered peer group,” Mike reflected, speaking about the pressures social media places on identity, self-image, and belonging during the teenage years.

The couple encouraged parents to delay smartphones and social media where possible, while also helping older teenagers grow in discernment, responsibility, and healthy scepticism about the online world.

At the same time, the evenings were deeply hopeful. Again and again, participants were reminded that healthy family culture is not built overnight, nor through perfection, but through small, consistent practices lived faithfully over time.

The Hernons encouraged families to begin simply: reclaiming Sundays as days for worship and family connection, protecting time for marriage, and prioritising shared family meals and conversation.

They also spoke about the importance of gradually giving teenagers freedom within healthy boundaries — allowing young people to learn discernment and responsibility while still supported by family life and faith.

Throughout the evenings, practical tools, humour, and honest stories helped create an atmosphere that was both challenging and encouraging for parents at every stage of family life.

Many left with a renewed sense that holiness in family life is often found not in extraordinary moments, but in the ordinary daily choices that shape a home over time.

Watch the podcast they recording with Dom from Evangelion below, even includes a shout out to Bishop Richard!