That teenagers have a strong sense of fairness is proven again.

Working recently in group time, boys were encouraged to discuss the 5 questions below. Their group answers were then shared with the school.

What are the ways people show they are fair? When is it easiest to be fair to others? When is it hardest to be fair to others? Where do you see fairness happening at King’s? ‘Sometimes life’s not fair’. Discuss

As you can imagine these prompted lively discussion. Common in the student feedback was that:

- Fairness was not just seen in theory but in actions such as how we hold conversations and treat people equally (Ls); share everything from pens and pencils (Gi) to lollies (Mk); how we take turns (Cn); show good sportsmanship; and how poor behaviour is dealt with in class. Fairness was also seen in use of ‘paper, scissors, rock’! (Bl)

- Not surprisingly, fairness was believed to be easiest to offer when you’re in a good mood, the other person is a friend or treating you fairly (Jp), when you’re winning, feeling good, safe, and in control (Ki) or when another person is obviously having a tough time and needing help (We)

- The boys regarded it as hardest to be fair when the other person is disagreeable or you are in a competitive situation when winning is important (which takes us back to having sportsmanship)

- Fairness was found in the classroom, at the canteen, and in games like handball (‘Playing 4 square in the yard’ [Jf]). The boys recognised fairness as happening in different places, in different ways. Fairness was also described as being about having courtesy, decency and balance. Little mention of the Arts and Culture as contexts for fairness was interesting to note.

- Regarding the last discussion point about life sometimes being unfair, comments were typically pragmatic; perhaps best summed up by Ly in: ‘Sometimes you try your best to complete things but it just doesn't go the way you want. There are hurdles on the way of success, so we have to find a way to get over them and accept it. It is what it is.’ Or by Cr: ‘Sometimes people get more or less than you and that's just the way it is sometimes.’ Bl noted that ‘Life’s just not fair’ is an excuse used by parents when they cannot be bothered to make a situation fair. A bit harsh. However, this group also stated that ‘if everything was fair then everything would go your way and life would have no challenge!’ A final observation from our modern times came from Bn: ‘Sometimes life’s not fair when students are gaming when other students are working.’ I couldn’t agree more…

Overall, it was really clear that fairness is understood well and given high importance by the boys.

The big challenge is how we teach and encourage them to build and act on a sense of fairness each day. (A conversation you’ve probably had with your son a number of times)

Ngā mihi nui

N. M. McIvor

Rector