The power of planning
As adults it is easy for us to assume that our children know how to do everyday things, just because we can do them. Planning ahead does not take long but it can be incredibly powerful.
For important milestones in life we make plans; teaching your child how to ride a bike; planning what they will do the first time they walk to school by themselves; what they will need to pack for a sleepover and so on. It is easy to overlook the more everyday milestones that come naturally to us as adults but may not be so easy for a child the first few times that they do it. This newsletter highlights three easy steps you can take to help plan for any new or infrequent activity that your child is doing. Planning ahead is incredibly important for neurodiverse students but it is also helpful in any situation where someone is unsure and needs support.
Step One: Make a step-by-step plan. For example, if your child is buying something at the local store by themselves for the first time, talk about each step they will need to take to help them feel confident. 1. They should say hello, and indeed may need to say excuse me if the person at the counter does not notice them. 2. They will need to know what to say or ask for. 3. They will need to have their money or cash flow card ready.
Step Two: Rehearse. This is where you can practise or role play the scenario. By doing this your child not only develops confidence in carrying out the plan but you may also spot possible pitfalls with the plan. For example, when rehearsing the above example your child might realise that they do not actually know the difference between certain coins or notes when paying, and they might decide that they need to take a backpack for the purchased item as they are walking home. You can update the plan as you rehearse and notice details that need to be added. Another way of rehearsing is getting your child to observe you when you are purchasing something so they can see you as a role model.
Step Three: Evaluate. Once the plan and activity have been completed take the time to review how well things went and what might need to be improved for next time, including unexpected events that may have happened. Evaluating helps to consolidate the planning; provides opportunities to praise your child; and leads to discussion about being flexible and asking for help when things do not go to plan.
Whilst there will certainly be many activities that your child can do without having to plan ahead, the power of planning, or at least asking your child if they would like to make a plan, is important. It helps your child to feel empowered, to develop their confidence and to believe that they can do things even if they find them challenging. The flip side to planning ahead is when your child has experience, does know how to do something and is developing their independence. Then it is important to step back and give your child the freedom to do their own planning, knowing that they can come to you for help if it is needed.
Good luck with your planning and please see the links below for previous newsletters that have also discussed planning, but in different contexts.
Image sourced from: Predictable Profits
Jenelle Hooson
Jenelle is a fully registered member with NZAC (New Zealand Association of Counsellors).
If you wish to discuss the services the School Counsellor can provide, please talk to your child’s homeroom teacher or make contact with Jenelle directly: jenelle.hooson@medbury.school.nz