As we near the end of Term One it is always good to reflect and look back on the past and acknowledge God’s goodness and faithfulness as we plan and prepare for the future. It has been a very busy term with our focus being on teaching and learning and growing young hearts and minds to follow and serve Christ. Thankfully, we do this in partnership with you as parents. In addition to this, staff and students have been involved in a wide range of co-curricular activities which are critical to the holistic education that we offer at Middleton Grange School.

Recently I read an article/blog about Christian parenting in the 21st Century. It highlighted ten lessons for parents to consider when raising their children and I have summarised the main points below. I hope you find these helpful as you continue to bring your children up in the ways of our Lord.

1. Remember that their rebellion is first against God, not you. Children are born sinners who are in need of a Saviour. Almost before they can express anything else, they are able to express their rebellion against their parents. As they grow older, this rebellion only increases, sometimes in loud and blatant ways and sometimes in sullen and silent ones. Be patient with them.

2. Pray. Pray, Pray, Pray. Pray for your children. Pray consistently, persistently, passionately, earnestly, and constantly.

3. Trust, Hope and Pray that God will save them and never give up. If you raise your children in an atmosphere soaked in the gospel, you can be confident that your children will respond to the gospel. But let me add this: While your children may be genuinely saved while they are very young, do not be surprised if neither you nor they have great confidence in their salvation until they have grown and matured. And that’s okay, because whether or not they have come to saving faith, they have the same need-the gospel.

4. Prioritize church (and, if possible, one church). Make worshipping and serving at church a priority and, whenever possible, stick to one church. There is no better family discipline than the discipline of being committed to a local church as the context for worshipping God and serving God’s people. You can only teach this to your children by example, by making it a high priority.

5. Teach your children to relate to adults. Your friends can (and should!) be your children’s friends as well. Do not be afraid of allowing other adults to influence them. Do not be afraid, even when they are young, to suggest, “Why don’t you talk to ___ about that.” It takes a church/village to raise a child.

6. Be confident but humble in your parenting. You need to beconfident enough that you are not constantly changing from one parenting model to another but humble enough to learn from others and especially to be continually challenged and corrected by God’s Word.

7. Make family devotions a priority. Apart from attending church, family devotions are the most important discipline your family can institute. This is a discipline to begin and to emphasize during the little years because, believe it or not, life only gets more chaotic once the children get older.

8. Understand that sometimes parenting is about surviving. In the little years a lot of parenting is actually just surviving-surviving through nursing and teething and fevers and tantrums, surviving when it has been weeks since you last had a decent night’s sleep and you’re pretty sure you can’t possibly make it through even one more. Sometimes in times of difficulty it is OK to break some of your parenting rules or preferences for the sake of survival and sanity.

9. Prioritize your marriage. Parenting is the best and hardest challenge your marriage will face. Though marriage and children are meant to exist together in perfect harmony, you will find that they each seek to compete with the other. Yet marriage needs to come first. The stability of a strong, loving, affectionate marriage will anchor the children, giving them confidence that whatever else happens in life, this marriage will stand firm. Find and create opportunities to prioritize and strengthen your marriage in ways the children will see and in ways they will never see. The children will benefit either way.

10. Give them grace. Extend grace to your children, not only justice. Teach your children that there are consequences for disobedience and discipline them with consistency, love and kindness. Don’t just tell them the gospel, but model it in your interactions with them.

I wish you God’s richest blessing as you continue to raise your children in the ways of the Lord.

Thank you for your ongoing support of our school; financially, practically and through your prayers.

May our Lord bless us and guide us as we enjoy a time of holidays and refreshment in preparation for Term 2.

Blessings in Christ

Mike Vannoort

Principal (Tumuaki)