justifiably / adverb / 1. with good reason.

one-eyed / adjective / 2. pertaining to breadth of vision and outlook.

Clamp-downs, cutbacks, clutch-buckets, and ‘the flying camel’. Four made-up terms that accurately describe the moves and grace of the 2021 OBHS Staff Basketball Team.

Facing Team Prefects in the Basketball World Series, the Staff’s dominance was total from the tip-off. We held the perimeter and the key, and you could almost be fooled into thinking we knew what we were doing.

Ten days on from such a sparkling performance, let us recap what we do know. Firstly, the staff applied half court press with aplomb. This is either when you are hard-pressed to run the full court and, instead, wisely wait beneath a hoop for a rebound or when you repeatedly steal the ball in the opponent’s half - we did both of these things well. Secondly, I was a white-hot talent. Why even be modest about it? And lastly, we scored something like 70 or 80 points and the prefects might have just got to 10.

Individual statistics and plays of note: Sewelly four from five from the three point line; McGarry, Aussie Import, and Matua Vai all clocking a double-double; probable ex-NBL star P Eaton with 20 steals and five assists; Hanson ‘loaded the gun’ for three from the floor; Gray, Sykes, Foster, and Garforth all reached double figures and combined for that unforgettable alley-oop at the buzzer. What an All Star team.

The prefects were also on the court, playing their version of the game, but I’ll leave the embellishment of that tale for another voice.

Dancin’ Dadley, out.

Ignore the hyperbole expounded above, and let me tell you the real story of August the 2nd.

Going into the match the prefects were a severely depleted fighting force, lacking key big men Jono Burnside and Semisi Tupou Taeiloa. Nevertheless, the lads went onto the court lacking significant talent but full to the brim with tenacity, hoping to do the boys proud.

From the get go, it was clear the teachers had an agenda; “win at all costs”. Preying on a lacklustre ref, elbows flew and fouls flourished while the prefects valiantly held the moral high ground of the match, less focused on winning points and more focused on preserving “You can’t win unless you learn how to lose”. - Kareem Abdul Jabbar. We look forward to the football match.

Michael Crosson the brotherhood. This particular author might suggest that the staff had spent too much of their lives worrying about grades and lost sight of the true meaning of sport. The prefects, on the other hand, spent their time entertaining and enjoying the day out, as all real sportsmen do.

The second half was a blur, and despite noble efforts from standout players Reuben Cook and Will Turner, nothing could stem the onslaught of deep twos from unlikely hero Mr McGarry. With the die cast and significantly short halves clearly designed to suit the woefully unfit, elderly staff, the Prefects of 2021 graciously admitted defeat, the score irrelevant and moral victory ensured.