I have heard this many times.

Parent X:  My son's well-being is low. He has no confidence. Can the school help?

Me: Can I ask you how much time he spends on his phone?

Parent X: Oh lots. Couldn’t tell you.

Me: Does he have it in his bedroom?

Parent X: Yes.

Me:  Is he anxious when he is not on his phone? Playing sport or chatting with mates etc?

Parent X: No.

Me: Do you think you could take his phone off him?

Parent X: Oh no, he wouldn’t like that.

Me: Does that matter?  We all like our kids to like us, all the time, but reality is different.

Parent X: Oh, you don’t understand he needs the phone.

Me: So he needs unlimited access to the thing that is making him feel anxious?

Parent X: It’s easier.

Me: Sorry, who did you say needed my help?

Rant over.

Enjoy your weekend. Dunedin Rocks. 

A generic conversation not related to any real kid. Parenting is hard. Writing newsletters is easy.