Year 13 Leavers' Dinner
During week three we held our annual Leavers’ Dinner, one of the last opportunities for our Year 13 students to socialise before they part ways at the end of the school year.
Thank you to all of the young men and staff who attended and made the evening a very positive and successful occasion. Thank you also to College House for hosting the Leavers’ Dinner and to the hostel catering staff for a fantastic meal. Special thanks to our guest speaker for the evening, Old Boy Mr. Simon Wickham, who provided many salient points for our Year 13’s as they begin to shift their focus more to their lives beyond school.
Deputy Head Prefect Aadesh Ganugapati introduced Mr. Wickham by sharing some of his school involvement and achievements beyond school (this information can be found below). However, when Mr. Wickham took the microphone he was very quick to explain that those achievements are only the highlights and that life is full of inevitable ‘ups and downs’.
He explained that we rarely see the full picture as people often do not share their struggles and this can give us a false impression – what is visible to the outside world is only a small part of the picture.
Mr. Wickham explained that he believes some things are more difficult for young people today and they face unique challenges as they contend with the “highlights reel” that is posted on social media. This can mean that we lose sight of reality.
Mr. Wickham shared some of the challenges that he has faced in life, explaining that “the upside of facing adversity is that it builds resilience.”
He encouraged the Year 13’s to work out who they are; know what your values are, know what is important to you and make decisions in life that are guided by these values. “Work out what fills your cup.”
‘People have been judging others for as long as there have been people on the planet.’ Mr. Wickham shared an example from Ancient Greece to support this and implored our young men not to let other people’s ideas hold them back.
Mr. Wickham explained the importance of having a Growth Mindset – of understanding that we can grow and improve and develop. We are not defined by our failures. Use failure as an opportunity to learn and to grow. He explained the power of ‘yet’ and how adding this small word to the end of a sentence when we can’t do something can be transformative. He extoled the work of Carol Dweck – read her book Mindset, watch her TED talk video or Google her work.
Mr. Wickham expounded the idea that leaving school should be one of the most exciting opportunities in life. When we leave school we start a new chapter in our lives and we have the opportunity to “re-write the book of our life.”
His advice on leaving school included:
· Never stop learning
· Be a sponge – soak up everything, ask lots of questions
· Don’t wait to be asked – approach people and ask questions, go out of your way to seek feedback
· “If you ask and get told ‘no’ you’re no worse off than you were when you started” – if you don’t ask you’ll never know what might have been possible
· “Self-doubt kills more dreams than failure ever did”
· Luck is the intersection of good timing and opportunity – put yourself in the position to take advantage of opportunities when they arise
He emphasised the importance of the power of conversation, a skill that can be developed: “develop the habit, get to know the interesting people who inhabit the same space as you.” Mr. Wickham went on to share a simple framework for conversation from Dale Carnegie’s bestselling book How to Win Friends and Influence People: use people’s names frequently in conversation; ask open ended questions to find out about people – find out about their background, family, work, where do they like to travel to, what are their interests, what have they read/watch/played recently? He emphasised that How to Win Friends and Influence People is a “book at the heart of who we are, not what we’ve done.”
Mr. Wickham concluded by explaining that in life there are three types of people: those who make things happen, those who watch things happen and those who ask “what the hell just happened?” Be one of the people who make things happen.
He then shared a quote from Henry Ford:
“If you think you can do a thing or think you can’t do a thing, you’re right.”
Mr. Wickham attended Palmy Boys’ from 1985-89 and was in Gordon Club. He was the Deputy Club Captain 1989 when Gordon Club were the Shand Shield Winners.
He was a member of the 1st X1 Hockey team from 1987 to 1989, was the captain in 1989 and played over 100 games for the 1st XI - a significant achievement. In his final year Mr. Wickham was named as a School Prefect.
This continued something of a family legacy. Mr. Wickham’s father Leon was captain of the 1st XI Hockey team and a School Prefect in 1961. And going a generation earlier, his grandmother Daisy was a Prefect pre-1919, while the school was co-ed as Palmerston North High School.
Upon leaving school Mr. Wickham studied Physical Education and Science at Otago University. He has completed further business courses at Harvard and Stanford Universities in the States and IMD in Switzerland.
Mr. Wickham has a passion for sport. He developed a love for sailing from the ‘Go sailing days’ held at the Centennial Lagoon, weeds and all. In 1999 he completed the Sydney-Hobart Yacht Race and in 2005 the Round North Island two-handed race. He was the CEO of NZ Yachting for five years.
He was Sport Manawatu’s Regional Sports Director and Programme Manager in the 1990s, CEO of West Auckland Trusts Services Ltd, has been inducted into the West Auckland Business Hall of Fame, is the Chief Executive of Trusts Stadium Waitakere, Director of Tourism Auckland and chaired Gymsports NZ.
Mr Wickham was the Hillary Commission Programme Director for three years. Since 2011 he has been a board member of High Performance New Zealand and since 2005 a New Zealand Olympic Committee board member and deputy chair. He also Chairs the NZ Olympic and Commonwealth Games selection panel as well as being the Chief Executive of a large Waikato Law Firm.
Thank you again to Mr. Wickham for joining us for our Year 13 Leavers’ Dinner and sharing some great messages.