A number of parents have raised the concern about their child's friendships at school. Navigating friendships is part of growing up and finding our place in the world.

At school, we set a Treaty at the beginning of the year as to how we are to treat one another.  We have circle time regularly to discuss issues, goal setting and activities to work to build independence and resilience. It's easy to step in and solve the issue for the child but this does not upskill our tamariki to deal with issues themselves. Our restorative processes are about ownership of issues and tamariki coming up with solutions to repair relationships.

The Parent Place has some very practical suggestions for parents on friendships. Check out this article.

Resilience is our goal for Term 2.

This article on resilience is also worth a read.  I have already shared with our teachers but is applicable to parents as well.

It highlights that we can "cultivate an approach to life that views obstacles as a critical part of success", this in turn builds resiliency. I’ve already heard a number of our teachers speaking to class/individuals about resilience in the context of the Cross Country. This is, for some, an obstacle they need to learn to overcome.

The article outlines some practical ideas for

• Setting brave goals
  

• Modelling learning from mistakes

• Encouraging responsible risks

• Labeling difficult emotions

• Talking about setbacks and human resilience

Also, watch out for the up and coming workshop, "Friendships – tips to navigating peer relationships during the primary years." This workshop is being run by Mana Ake for Kahukura school whānau.

Schools are not a cure all! Not every day is going to be perfect. Your children are not always going to win the game, be in the group they want to be in, get a certificate at assembly. They will fall out with their friends or not be picked for the team.  We need to work together to help our tamariki understand that there are many obstacles in life, some of which they might not like. We cannot rescue our children all the time. To worry is a natural reaction, not a reason to avoid. But it is our job as the adults, to help them overcome obstacles as these are a "critical part of success." We all wish our tamariki to be empowered to be successful.