Lucy Burke - Liaison Prefect - Community

If I could go back in time, I’d tell my younger self one thing—stop trying

to fit in and start being yourself. It sounds cliché, and while it might be,

this advice will always withstand the test of time. But that doesn’t mean

it’s easy to follow. Believe me, when the wave of new students came in

year 9, I retreated into my shell of comfort and didn’t come out for years.

Year 9 for me was equally as formative and fun as it was daunting and

awkward. Don’t get me wrong, I still had a great year overall, but as we

have all experienced, growing up and discovering ourselves is a

seemingly never ending journey. At this stage of my life, I was thirteen

and desperate to fit in. Spoiler alert, this was not a good idea, because

my version of “fitting in” was basically to suppress any individual self

expression. This led me to become fairly insecure, reserved and too shy

to make new friends. I went on for quite some time only interacting with

around five regular peers, and caring way too much about how everyone

perceived me.

Fortunately, in Year 11, everything changed when I went on a two-month

exchange to Perth. Without meaning to, I let go of the pressure to fit in. I

wasn’t weighed down by self imposed expectations, and for the first

time, I stopped overthinking how I came across. I spoke up more,

stopped worrying about whether I was doing things the “right” way, and

guess what? Making real, genuine friends became effortless, and I did it

all by embracing who I really was.

As it turns out, the so-called “new me” wasn’t new at all. She was just

the version of myself I’d been too scared to show back home. That

exchange made me realise how much easier life is when you stop

seeking the approval of others, and start living life on your own terms.

Looking back, it’s almost funny how much weight I gave to my peers’

approval when they were likely going through the same things I was. Yet

I don’t blame my younger self—conforming feels safe. It’s frustrating how

normal it is to want to meet expectations that were never yours to begin

with. But stepping away from that? That’s when life actually starts.

So, if I could give my younger self one last piece of advice?

Forget “normal.” Be you - sooner rather than later - and I promise you won’t regret it.