Yakeza Mae Sarona was a nurse in Wellington Hospital when she was diagnosed with cancer in 2015. She died on 6 June 2017 aged 30 years. This is the remarkable letter Yakeza wrote to her family and friends when she knew she was dying.

"If Christine is reading this now in front of all of you, then it happened already. My final journey on earth has finally ended and I’m now together with the Lord our God, in heaven. I promised Christine I’ll write a letter to be read in the church during my service because I still wanted to do witnessing up to the very end. It’s okay to cry. I understand all your tears. I understand you saying “but she’s too young!” or “but she still has many plans in life” or “she should have fought harder”, etc. I would have definitely said the same things when I was not yet renewed as a Catholic.

"When I learned I have a cancer since December 2015, I learned that death comes with it. I feared death that’s why I went for treatment. Every time doctors would explain the risks of any treatments I would undergo, death is always present. So I have slowly accepted death as part of my condition. It is a miracle I came this far. As I always say, my life is a miracle itself. Up to the very end, I received my miracle. Not all were privileged to be given precious time to prepare for their deaths. Jesus loves me so much to grant me that precious time to say to my loved ones that I love them with all my heart and to reconcile and say sorry to people I have wronged; to be given extra time and enough strength to serve God and to understand my obligations as Catholic.

"[I] remember it was a busy week for me last Holy Week. It was my first time to join Bisita Iglesia, 7 Last Words, Veneration of Cross, etc. I tried slight fasting for that week. I omitted meat in my diet for a week. It was [a] very fulfilling experience and I have that prompting that I have to do it. After that week, my body slowly deteriorated but my soul is saved! All of you have sent your comforting messages and I’m very grateful. I am so confused when people say: “Keep on fighting!”, “Hold on!”, “Hope for a miracle!” There’s no need to keep on fighting coz there’s no more fight. LOL! [Laugh out loud] I saw Jesus comforting me, dawn of the day I received the news from the doctor. Since then, every 4 am, He (Jesus) would wake me up and comfort me. Jesus assured me not to worry and that He is always beside me. I asked Him: “Jesus, promise me na [that] when the time comes, it’s your hand I will hold, and take me to Your Father’s kingdom in heaven.” And He smiled at me tenderly. I saw Mama Mary as well, comforting me like a mother. And I prayed every night: “Jesus please comfort my family.”

"Now I want to discuss my miracles. (Char! Char! Murag teacher Yot! Hahaha!) [See! Like a teacher Christine! Hahaha!] I received my miracles. To all people present here, to my loved ones who are not here and to my KPF [Kapatiran Prayer Fellowship] Family, please don’t let this event waver your faith. Believe me, I received my miracle. Miracles are not just physical healing. I received [a] far greater miracle which is spiritual healing. I have not explained it to everyone but I have a vision before, the time I had the chemo and I was really ill. I told some of you that I went to heaven and I insisted to God the Father that I wanted to stay there forever and He told me to come back to earth for I still have a mission to do. I was thinking I will be a preacher or a missionary. Then I realise now, that I was meant to come back because of that spiritual healing. Jesus promised me healing during that vision. I went through the transplant procedure miraculously so well. I was so positive the whole time because Jesus had promised healing. When relapse occurred, I asked “but where’s the promised healing?” And then He let me realise that it’s not physical healing but my spiritual healing, a very precious gift above. Thank you Lord! Halleluiah.

"To my family — mama, pop, auntie, Kim, Tata and the whole clan. You know how blessed I feel that I have two families. If I haven’t told you that I love you all, it’s because I am that way. I do not say much but I do show how I care. That’s why I’m a worrier. I was born to worry for everyone. If I’m silent, it means I respect you and love you. I always hate confrontation. I don’t like arguing and most especially gossiping. In your own time, in your own free will, I wish you would all reconcile and leave the past behind. I want you all to understand the life I chose for myself; the life of self-denial for our Lord Jesus. I wish I had more time to explain to you what kind of life that is but you can ask my KPF Family. It’s fulfilling and that’s what we’re meant to do. This is me knocking on my families’ hearts and asking them to accept Jesus. Don’t grieve too much as it saddens me. Remember that today should be a day of celebration as I have joined our Lord Jesus in heaven. Please do pray for me always and I will be praying in heaven for all of you.

"When I was still in Kuwait, I have prayed to the Lord to grant me New Zealand. I promised Him I will serve Him with all my life when I get to NZ. And it was given to me. New Zealand is my dream place and I have achieved it with the Lord’s help. It was not an easy journey. There were lots of drama and action. Then arriving in New Zealand, more challenges came. When you think about it, it’s very exhausting. But even so, I wouldn’t change a thing. When I compare it to Jesus’ Passion, mine is nothing. I am weak but because it is no longer I, but Christ in me, I managed to surpass all the challenges.

"When people say to me “don’t’ give up!”, “keep on fighting”, “wait for God’s miracle”, I feel sad and it’s not comforting to me. I fought so hard and people very close to me can testify that I never gave up on Jesus and His miracles. I’m in a lot of pain and I’m so tired but I don’t show it. What’s there to fight when it’s already the end of my journey? It’s Jesus, Himself, calling me to come to Him… who am I to refuse? It is my privilege to be with Him, finally in heaven! I’m actually excited to go.

"To my KPF family, you were meant to find me. Thank you for everything you have done for me and my family. Thank you for all spiritual teachings and for inspiring me always. I am humbled by your selflessness. You taught me that if you really want to serve Him, there are no excuses. It can be done. How you juggle family, career, kids and serving the Lord? It really inspires me. Thank you for welcoming me in the community and treating me like family.

"To my Single KPF family. First to our PG [prayer group] head, Cristina. Sis Tina, thank you po for making me feel comfortable and making sure that my family are comfortable too. Thank you po for understanding when I’m feeling unwell. Sometimes I feel embarrassed because I can’t help around the house. Thank you po for guiding me and enlightening me when I felt confused. Thank you po for driving me around. You’re like a big sister to me. 

"To sis Miezy… Hahahaha! I can’t help but laugh when it comes to you Miezy because I want to tease you all the time. Remember when we were eating in Majestic [Restaurant] and you said you don’t want to look at me inside the coffin and I said you have to look at me!? I will do peek-a-boo when you look at me! And you were so terrified so we laughed at you. I’m just joking. If you don’t want to look, it’s okay. But if I wear sunglasses, will you look? LOL… just kidding… Thank you Miezy for babysitting me. Although your mum needs you more, you chose to stay with me. With that I’m forever grateful. Thank you for making me laugh, for cooking for me, for staying late at night just to watch over me. 

"To sis Bheng, thank you for coming over to me the first time in the hospital with sis Gen. Thank you for giving me my first Catholic Bible. Thank you for your continuous prayers for me. 

"To my dearest sis Aggie, I always pray for you. Sis Aggie, death is not something to be afraid of. Don’t worry about the future, God will provide always. Just continue to be positive. If you encounter something bad, turn it into a blessing. Never forget that God loves you so much and if you ever need help, it’s okay to ask. 

"Christine or Tintin (pop’s accent)… where should I start? Our relationship is one that is unexpected but extraordinary. I did not expect we would be friends because you are so loud, full of life, kitikiti [hyperactive], Ms Know-It-All, di gyud palupig! [wouldn’t give in!] Hahaha! But despite our differences, I came to love you. You taught me so many things and made me realise how so behind I am in serving the Lord. I envy your dedication to serve Him. That’s why I was striving so hard to get well, so I can join you. For our tampuhan [times when we move away or give the other the silent treatment because of hurt feelings], I’m so sorry for hurting you. Remember the time when I was in isolation, I was emotionally upset because you won’t give me any food [from] outside [the] hospital. That was really funny! Your dedication to help me really amazed me. For those times you have to stay with me even before and after work, then cook for me and stayed late at night to watch over me. At these times I would wish na [that] I will be hospitalised so you can rest at home. For all the big help you have given me, I can never repay you on this world. So I told you I will beg God to make me a warrior beside Saint Michael so I can fight with him whenever you have tauntings and harassments. I will be there fighting with you Christine. This is our journey together. If you ever have difficulty with patients, just remember that I am that patient and me saying: “Christine, it’s so hard to be a patient.” You know of my sufferings and how I fought so hard. I’m so sorry for scaring you a lot whenever I have infections. I can’t thank you enough. I love you forever and you are my sister for life. You are a big comfort to my family. I will still attend our PG meetings, KPF events, singles gala [strolls]. I will be laughing with you, singing songs of praises and praying with you. Even now while you are reading this, I am among the crowd laughing and teasing you and Miezy. (Uyy, kalimot kong Shelley, next page mora) [Oh, I forgot about Shelley, I’ll do that on the next page].

"That’s all I wanted to say. Thank you for being a part of my journey. Thank you all for helping me and my family. I can’t repay your goodness but I’ll be praying for you. Please keep me in your prayers as well. I won’t say goodbye… but see you later in heaven! I love you all."

Yakeza Mae S. Sarona (signed)

01/05/2017

Yakeza Mae Sarona, also called “Mimi” by her friends, was a nurse at the Wellington Regional Hospital. She was diagnosed with Acute Myeloid Leukaemia in December 2015 and underwent cancer treatment. She was in remission from April 2016 and attended the KPF Life in the Spirit Programme from July to November 2016. It was during this time when she applied and was granted New Zealand residency. She was also an active member of the Singles Prayer Group of the KPF Community and assisted the KPF Youth Ministry. She had a relapse early November and underwent treatment again leading to a bone marrow transplant in February 2017. The transplant was initially successful but her body succumbed to the cancer a couple of months later. She was in palliative care at Mary Potter Hospice in May when she passed away at the age of 30 on 6 June 2017. She is survived by her parents Ken and Theresa, and siblings Kim and Rachel.