WBHS Valedictory Speech 2022 - Ethan Reille

E te whanau

E te whanau whanui

E te iwi whanui

E nga mana

E nga reo

E nga waka

Tena koutou katoa

Growing up I was always a curious child, always asking questions. It got to the point where my parents would dread spending more than 10 minutes in the car with me. But why? I would always ask. Why are the trees green? Why do they stand upright? But why, Mum?

Whilst I have always been somewhat of a shy person, with public speaking being my biggest fear, I’ve never been afraid of questioning something.

Many of you will know me, but for those of you who don’t my name is Ethan Reille, whilst some others may know me as Ethan Rail, Riley, Reale… whatever works really. Regardless, I’m very proud to be the headboy here at Waitaki Boys’.

My journey here at Waitaki started in late 2017. My family and I lived in Wellington and I was nearing the end of intermediate. At this point we had lived all over the place, Palmerston North, Hawkes Bay, even the great distance of Sydney, Australia… So where to next? Never in my wildest dreams did I imagine Mum suggesting we move to Waimate!

And after a few minutes googling “What is Waimate most famous for?” I knew Mum must’ve been joking. Luckily she was! And before I knew it, I was attending the 2017 Junior Prize Giving, right here in this hall.

On that day I discovered the young man in the black blazer.

Shortly after, Mr Cathcart sat me down and asked “Ethan, what would you like to achieve here at Waitaki Boys’?” I responded “To be headboy”... eager I know, but it was truly my goal since day 1.

Hearing my name get called out as headboy for 2022 was a surreal experience. On the inside it was the best news I had ever received. Whilst on the outside, many have described it looked as if I had just been told my dog had died.

However, tonight isn’t about me! In fact it’s all much bigger than me. It’s about all you boys and the brotherhood we have come to know and align ourselves with.

Brotherhood. What is it really? Honestly, it’s hard to explain without having experienced it yourself.

For me, It’s the act of a student being part of something much bigger than himself. To have that sense of belonging. To be part of the brotherhood means you are one of us and you are a brother to all of us.

Everyone here in this hall tonight, has worked tirelessly to restore that sense of brotherhood.

As we now reflect on what the past 5 years have been, I now see the school to be in a settled position with great potential, a diverse range of culture, opportunities and pride. Waitaki is a unique school, it’s different, quirky, it’s an all boys school.

However, look out to all our leavers tonight, and witness just how monumental these opportunities have been for us, and how much we have benefited from them.

Our school has only evolved, especially with the way society has shaped in recent years. We have modernized. Whilst there is still much work to be done. No longer are the days where we call boys up on their hairstyles, and as a result: mullets, mullets, mullets.

No longer do we restrict boys from portraying their true identity, with allowing acceptance to wearing an earring, speaking confidently about themselves, and pursuing whatever passions they’re interested in.

As a result, Waitaki Boys’ has become a more inclusive space. It has been the year of student voice. Whether it be Ka Ora Ka Ako, where we ensure every boy is offered a free healthy lunch every day, or our new school haka embracing te ao maori and our whakapapa or even a student-led peer support programme.

The Year 13’s made do with what we had and got on with it. We remained dedicated to ensuring our relationship with the Year 9’s was rebuilt effectively, sometimes perhaps a little too effectively. I remember the days when Year 13’s were giving us Year 9’s a slap around the neck and a “tuck your shirt in, pull your socks up!”, this year it seemed the roles were reversed, and instead year 9’s were kicking us up the backside and telling us to pull our socks up!

Regardless, this has been a real game changer. Whether it was the simple act of us boys sitting around a dining hall table, having a laugh and eating the same lunch, or boys speaking more passionately about themselves, and feeling part of the brotherhood. I truly believe we are leaving Waitaki Boys’ in a much better, fairer and inclusive place.

When stepping into the role of headboy I only had one goal. That was to ensure we had a headboy and prefect team that was emotionally and physically available, that led with kindness. In hope that we would break down the barriers and combat the kiwi stigma of male mental health and toxic masculinity.

Mental Health is a tricky one. It’s not an open wound that can be treated nor healed just with time. It’s a daunting virus that often leaves one feeling lonely, trapped, and defeated. It hides in the shadows and has the ability of disguising itself.

Boys, it’s time we put our pride on the shelf. Talk to your mates, find your support person and just have a conversation with them. Check in on your mates, and family. For a simple “what’s up?” could change everything. We really do never know what is going on behind closed doors. Be kind, be brave, and support one another.

I know with the work carried out by our Year 13’s, mental health is an issue that is now more easily discussed and understood. As a result, we have been able to curate our very first wellbeing team in hope to continue breaking down those barriers and bring the darkness of mental health into the sunlight.

Janice I am aware of how modest you are, yet without you, we could not have provided for our boys and, for many of them, changed the course of their life. You have helped Waitaki Boys' develop a culture that works for the benefit of all of us. You had a boot full of energy when you first entered this school, and you still do. Now the only question we ask you is, who’s in the boot today? Is it you, or that bloody boy Nic?

I have many people to thank for the continuous support I have had throughout this year.

Of course, I cannot forget the two men supporting me, by my side the whole way. My deputies, the staunch Derick and the kind Sione, the very first Tongan Deputy headboy here at Waitaki Boys’. These two have made for a great support team.

And a special mention to all the prefects. Whilst we all stepped into an uncertain position and were faced with many challenges, you were all committed from day one. There was always a prefect presence everywhere we went. And we always held our roles to a high standard.

I want to thank both my parents Victoria and Mark. Even with years of debating practice, I still haven’t quite mastered the art of winning an argument with Mum. Regardless, I came home most days at different hours, sometimes stressed, sometimes filled with joy - however Mum was always waiting with a plate of dinner and an ear to listen to and advice waiting to be shared.

I also want to thank my Nona, Jennifer who has traveled all the way from Wellington tonight. My Nona has always had a heart of gold and breath of fight. It’s her who I get my passion and energy from - to do the right thing, to make the world a better place for all.

I’d also like to thank members of the community who have supported me in pursuing this role. Helen Algar, Melanie Tavendale, Gary Kircher, Hana Halalele, Rebecca Ryan, Bruce Albiston, Cara Tipping-Smith, Leanne Kingan, Andrea Ludemann, Kelly Jones and of course Rachel Brooking. Thank you for everything you’ve done for me, this school and Waitaki.

I now want to thank a very special person. Mr Paterson. When reflecting on the past 10 months, I remember a point towards the end of term 1, where I was really struggling. To put it bluntly, I was questioning my role as headboy. Was I fulfilling its purpose? Was I serving for the betterment of this school, its staff and students? And why was I doubting myself so much at such an early stage?

Mr Paterson observed my doubts and one afternoon called me into his office. Instantly I put on my poker face, not wanting to let the side down, and hold my promise that I made to him, that I wouldn’t let him down.

Of course, being a father and a staff member at multiple all boys schools… he saw straight through this. He said to me, “Ethan, leadership roles like ours always have their challenges, there will be good days and bad. But at the end of those days, we must remember our why and keep pushing through”. He then continued with the following poem:

If you can keep your head when all about you

Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,

If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,

But make allowance for their doubting too;

If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,

Or being lied about, don’t deal in lies,

Or being hated, don’t give way to hating,

And yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise:

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,

Or walk with Kings—nor lose the common touch,

Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it,

And—which is more—you’ll be a Man, my son!

Mr Paterson, over the past 5 years you have shown all of us your utmost dedication to provide inspiring young men of outstanding character. Our Year 13 cohort is testament to that.

And behind every good man is always a good support team. I want to thank Mr Van Booma and Mr Fifita. Your can-do attitudes and humble approach to everything always rubs off well on the boys. And as a side note… you both represent the ‘clean shaven’ policy so well… Mr Fifita even taking it that one step further. And Mr VB many of us are still waiting for those many, promised KFC buckets. But we won’t take it personally.

But on a serious note, a big thank you to all staff. I know that for all of you, there is at least one boy in this hall that would go to you for support over the years. That says a lot about you and the culture of this school.

It’s so clear as to how much mana and pride you all hold for this school. The faith you put in me as headboy, and the potential you have unlocked in me has been truly humbling.

To Mrs Turner… you’ve seemed to find yourself holding many roles this year. First it was as our dean, then TIC of rugby, then relief, and now Principal's Nominee, and boy have you given them your all.

I am truly humbled to be leaving alongside you tonight, and proud to have been your first and last headboy here at Waitaki Boys’.

You’ve always been there for me and the boys this year. Right from the moment you toured the school this time last year. You’ve been a shoulder to lean on, someone to rant to, and always someone to share the highs with. You just get us and we get you.

On behalf of the boys and I, I do have to apologize for that one time we ditched school early on a Friday afternoon. At the time we didn’t know you’d be waiting in the dean suite with a detention in hand and a lecture waiting for all of us on the Monday morning. We definitely deserved that one.

But seriously, thank you. I will never forget or take any of your drive for granted. You’ve made this year so enjoyable.

One thing I am very fortunate to have the privilege of doing, is announcing the recipient of the Prefects Cup. This award is to acknowledge a teacher who goes above and beyond, and serves this school with great pride and passion.

This person has supported myself and the boys since day 1 of year 9. She’s put up with a lot of our antics. Whether it was that one time Nic and I went crying to her in Year 10, wondering why all the boys were poking our bums. Or that crab Tyree accidentally threw across the lab at Crab Camp this year. Yet at the end of the day she’s always willing to support us.

This year she’s stepped up to help organize a formal, leavers dinner, and of course this prize giving, and a sports prize giving which she’s done for the past 6 years. Whilst she wasn’t our Year 13 dean this year, she’s certainly supported Mrs Turner in such a role.

So, as I am sure you can all guess by now. I am very proud to announce the Teacher of 2022 is… Miss Matthews!!!!

What a great bunch of staff we do have though.

Our school offers a great amount of history and tradition as we know. Speaking of history… g’day Mr Blackbeard.

Whilst he’s not here tonight, we have to give Mr Henehan a major acknowledgement. We drove him away from being our year 13 dean this year… so in the end, and being the only geo teacher, he had to make up his own role as head of geography. According to Mr Blackbeard this is where we learn about green grass, fluffy clouds and those things called rocks. I’m still unsure who the real hooplehead is in this place, perhaps we all are!

I always remember this one time back during Year 9 activity week. Mr Cathcart decided to take us boys bowling. He was a bit nervous, and well, reluctant I guess you could say… afterall he was the only one there still using the push ramp.

We can’t forget to mention the dynamic duo. Mrs Crane and Miss Matthews. Ying and Yang, one has a calm and collected approach to things… the other not so much. You can guess who. But hey, thanks for the constant nagging, many internals would still be left incomplete if it weren’t for you two.

Many of you will know that I am no athlete… I think I’ve made that pretty clear. As you can imagine taking up football this year was a bit of a surprise to many… which was in fact very short lived. And whilst Mr Lane continues to rip me to shreds for it… hey at least I still walked away with feeling in both my legs.

Mr Westgate… now I won’t say anything bad, I know how nervous you’ve been and I don’t really want a spin kick to the jaw. After all you’ve dealt in more fights than year 9’s on the back field.

To our awesome Kara Cox, it’s always a wonder how much work you really got done this year with the amount of boys always visiting your office. Although it might’ve just been me most of the time if I’m being completely honest.

Now I know this speech is long, but at least it’s nowhere as long as it took to build the turf. Meanwhile, you could argue there’s been more staff smoko breaks than credits achieved this year.

And after 18 years of ‘righto gentlemen’ bos is finally retiring.

Now I know I have talked for long enough, and I know there will be some very nervous Year 12’s sitting on the edge of their seats. So, I want to say to all of you waiting patiently. I know how you feel, 46 of us Year 13’s know how you feel, however don’t take any of this for granted.

This year you all stepped up without being asked. You’ve proved to us all just how ready you are for the leadership that lies ahead.

To those receiving prefect roles, remember that it is a privilege and not a right. Pull your socks up and tuck your shirts in. You are now leaders so lead by example.

To those that don’t receive roles, don’t be discouraged by this, instead see it as an opportunity. A role does not define who you are as a person, you define the role.

One of you will be receiving the role of headboy tonight, so to that young man, know that there is no rule book for headboy, everyone has different leadership styles. Lead in your own style and others will follow. Don’t change yourself to be the perfect man that doesn’t exist. Be kind to yourself. I know it’ll change your life like it has mine.

To my Year 13 boys, I can’t begin to explain how proud I am of all of you. We’ve been on a rollercoaster, and whilst Covid can’t continue to be an ongoing excuse, it certainly set us back on many occasions. But, we always pulled through, we always got stuck in and we always got on with it.

We started here as wee boys, our socks knee-high and shirts neatly ironed. Now we leave as brave, courageous young men. With a whole world waiting for us to explore. I can’t believe how far we’ve come.

You truly are my brothers, and I cannot thank you enough for the support you have given me.

Often we have been asked, “If you could speak to your Year 9 self today what would you say to him?”. I want you all to think about that for a moment. For myself, what would I tell 13 year old Ethan? Well, I’d tell him to stop doubting himself. Be comfortable with being uncomfortable and have faith that everything will work out. Because here we are, everything has worked out.

Tonight you all deserve every single moment of congratulations, celebration and pride. We’ve done it! We’ve graduated high school. Ezra described it as a 5 year sentence. However it’s felt, It’s been a privilege to stand alongside you all for the past 5 years.

I am so excited to see where you all go. Some of us are off to University, some off to be a tradie, others to drive bobcats and some even to fly planes.

Wherever you go, whatever you do - I know that from the passions and resilience you’ve shown over the past 5 years, you will succeed!

I know that no matter the distance, the brotherhood will always keep us close.

If I could leave with just one message to everyone here tonight , our leavers, our stayers, all our staff, and of course members of the community…

Always be curious, always question everything, and always ask “But why?”.